Today was for him and I. From beginning to end we only had each other. It started snowing close to the time that Daddy would be getting off of work so sadly he had to stay. And stay. And stay. Today, he climbed onto a kitchen chair. And then onto the kitchen table. Today, he got on the couch, with ease, and smiled with his entire face...a proud look that said, " I did it Mama!" Today, he rolled his little 4wheeler near the big blue chair, climbed on top of it, and dived for the chair...with success! Today, we raced against each other. He had his 4wheeler and I had his walker. He beat me. Today, I put him in the back of his metal Tonka dump truck and drove him around the living room. So many times throughout this day we looked into each others eyes and had a moment. Of what? Recognition that we belong to each other, I think. All of these things that happened today were new. I heard that 18 months brings big changes. Eli will be 15 months on December 21st. Today brought big changes.
Today was a precious day, one to hold on to.
My heart is so full of love for our boy.
Monday, December 16, 2013
Thursday, December 12, 2013
Crawl
Life has always felt heavy to me. I've asked myself why so many times and I've come to the conclusion. I'm deep. The level at which I operate from is way below the surface. I'm sure to the outside world it doesn't appear that way...I can do social, surface. But, I feel everything at such a deep level. Every moment matters. Every moment is big. I never just have "regular" days or "boring" days. I think I would like to. Tonight after yet another heavy day, Eli greeted me with a giant hug! I knelt down to his level and held him tightly. He's so affectionate these days. My heart melts. We crawl up the stairs together, though we both can walk just fine, and race to the end of the hallway. We pause at the tall mirror that lines the wall at the end of that hallway and stare at ourselves. We giggle. Mother and Son...though in that moment I'm a child too. I thank God for this perspective that my boy brings. The heaviness lifts and in its place is pure joy.
Wednesday, November 6, 2013
14 Months (well, almost!)
I haven't kept up on tracking Eli like I thought I would. Life is a bit of a whirlwind when you have a little person, but despite that I am enjoying all of our moments. I am thankful with each new day that he and I have together. He will be 14 months on November 21st! He has his next Dr. appt. on the 13th and I always look forward to those.
He's such a love! Smiles and laughs a ton. He is very expressive and this might be my very favorite thing about him. He is getting more cuddly. Sometimes he will walk up from behind me (while I am sitting on the floor, playing with him) and hug my neck.
His absolute favorite is when he gets his shoes put on and you let him loose! He is quite independent.
He's still in a size 3 diaper (such a skinny little waist!). He's quickly growing out of his size 4.5 shoes.
He wears size 12-18 month shirts, but he could seriously still rock some 9 month pants. 12's are often too big!
He goes to a woman's house who watches children two days per week. He used to cry when I dropped him off (mainly because he was tired at that time in the morning), but now he goes easily. He tries to open the door to the basement where the kids are already playing. This does make it easier on this Mama!
He also spends one day per week with each set of his Grandparent's. He still hasn't spent the night anywhere, I haven't been ready for that - but, I know he would do just fine at either place.
He does very well in social settings (unless he's tired!) - he loves watching people, especially kids. He laughs every time he sees a kid...it's the cutest!
He sleeps 8-10 hours straight per night. Wakes up in the early morning for a bottle and then goes back to sleep for a short time.
My favorite time with him continues to be the morning! He's so happy!!! And, we have the getting ready down to an art. He knows the program and he goes with it easily. We get up so early that getting out of the house, on time, is never an issue.
He is down to one nap per day! This is a bummer because he is very tired in the evening...as in crabby tired! So the hour and a half leading up to bedtime is a little challenging ; ) He sleeps 1.5 to 3 hours for his nap. Usually the 1.5 for me and the 3 for Kirstan who watches him. She gets the good nap because the kids wear him out! The Grandma's get anywhere from 1.5 to 3, just depends on him that day!
His hair color seems to be getting blonde and I am thrilled about that. We don't have much blonde hair in my family! He's got my brown eyes, but Rob & Emily's eyelashes and eye shape. He is a good mix of Rob and I depending on his expression can look just like either one of us!
We are enjoying our gift and aren't taking any of it for granted. Thank you God for our precious son!
He's such a love! Smiles and laughs a ton. He is very expressive and this might be my very favorite thing about him. He is getting more cuddly. Sometimes he will walk up from behind me (while I am sitting on the floor, playing with him) and hug my neck.
His absolute favorite is when he gets his shoes put on and you let him loose! He is quite independent.
He's still in a size 3 diaper (such a skinny little waist!). He's quickly growing out of his size 4.5 shoes.
He wears size 12-18 month shirts, but he could seriously still rock some 9 month pants. 12's are often too big!
He goes to a woman's house who watches children two days per week. He used to cry when I dropped him off (mainly because he was tired at that time in the morning), but now he goes easily. He tries to open the door to the basement where the kids are already playing. This does make it easier on this Mama!
He also spends one day per week with each set of his Grandparent's. He still hasn't spent the night anywhere, I haven't been ready for that - but, I know he would do just fine at either place.
He does very well in social settings (unless he's tired!) - he loves watching people, especially kids. He laughs every time he sees a kid...it's the cutest!
He sleeps 8-10 hours straight per night. Wakes up in the early morning for a bottle and then goes back to sleep for a short time.
My favorite time with him continues to be the morning! He's so happy!!! And, we have the getting ready down to an art. He knows the program and he goes with it easily. We get up so early that getting out of the house, on time, is never an issue.
He is down to one nap per day! This is a bummer because he is very tired in the evening...as in crabby tired! So the hour and a half leading up to bedtime is a little challenging ; ) He sleeps 1.5 to 3 hours for his nap. Usually the 1.5 for me and the 3 for Kirstan who watches him. She gets the good nap because the kids wear him out! The Grandma's get anywhere from 1.5 to 3, just depends on him that day!
His hair color seems to be getting blonde and I am thrilled about that. We don't have much blonde hair in my family! He's got my brown eyes, but Rob & Emily's eyelashes and eye shape. He is a good mix of Rob and I depending on his expression can look just like either one of us!
We are enjoying our gift and aren't taking any of it for granted. Thank you God for our precious son!
Wednesday, May 8, 2013
House on a Rock
Monday afternoon, while Eli was napping, I dusted my curio cabinet. I'm pretty sure I haven't dusted it since well before Eli was born. It needed some love. I enjoy dusting the items in there slowly, every item contains meaning for me. While I was dusting off a miniature pie plate of my Grandma H's an overwhelming feeling of missing her overcame me. I used to take naps (in this very home) when I was a small child. Grandma would often surprise me with a mini pie that she made - just for me! So much love came from her in that little treat. She always made me feel extra special. She gave me so much to hold onto. I suppose that is why I have such a connection with her, even in her being gone.
As I was wiping the pie plate clean of dust, I spoke to her in my mind about how much I miss her. It broke my heart that all of my Grandparents died before Eli came into existence. I am grateful that I had relationships with all four of them into my adult life. So many cannot say that. I am glad that Emily got to know both of my Grandma's.
As I was putting the pie plate back into the cabinet, the scent of my Grandma surrounded me. A scent hard to describe, a bit of perfume - a bit of dessert baking...but, her nonetheless. How could this be? I knew I wasn't imagining it. The moment was so real, so beautiful. People who have never had a spiritual (indescribable) encounter might think I am crazy. But, as my tattoo on my right shoulder states, "For we walk by faith, not by sight." I've come to a place in my life where I don't need to see to believe. We plant the seed in the ground and we water it ... but, who grows it?! We take a walk outside on a breezy day and feel the wind upon our faces...but, we can't see it. This is faith. The invisible world that is all around us. I so often think about how to tell people about my faith. How do you get someone to believe when they so badly need to see facts and proof? I just pray for others to have moments like this. My life is filled with them. I am not more special than anyone else - I am just trusting and open to them.
Today I am thankful for the (long awaited) warmth and sunshine. For my baby who is sleeping peacefully in his crib. For my husband who works so hard and loves his family more than anything. For Emily who is a great all around kid. For both sets of our parents, who are still married and who offer us constant support and love. For my business mentor. For my spiritual mentor. For all our friends and family. For my doggies. For this home. For our family business. And, for all the people that came before us.
Thank you God for the opportunity to even be here at all...walking this Earth, making these connections. I will continue to keep my eyes on you.
Matthew 7:24-26 "Therefore whoever hears these sayings of mine, and does them, I will liken him to a wise man, which built his house on a rock: And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat on that house; and it fell not: for it was founded on a rock. And every one that hears these sayings of mine, and does them not, shall be likened to a foolish man, which built his house on the sand."
As I was wiping the pie plate clean of dust, I spoke to her in my mind about how much I miss her. It broke my heart that all of my Grandparents died before Eli came into existence. I am grateful that I had relationships with all four of them into my adult life. So many cannot say that. I am glad that Emily got to know both of my Grandma's.
As I was putting the pie plate back into the cabinet, the scent of my Grandma surrounded me. A scent hard to describe, a bit of perfume - a bit of dessert baking...but, her nonetheless. How could this be? I knew I wasn't imagining it. The moment was so real, so beautiful. People who have never had a spiritual (indescribable) encounter might think I am crazy. But, as my tattoo on my right shoulder states, "For we walk by faith, not by sight." I've come to a place in my life where I don't need to see to believe. We plant the seed in the ground and we water it ... but, who grows it?! We take a walk outside on a breezy day and feel the wind upon our faces...but, we can't see it. This is faith. The invisible world that is all around us. I so often think about how to tell people about my faith. How do you get someone to believe when they so badly need to see facts and proof? I just pray for others to have moments like this. My life is filled with them. I am not more special than anyone else - I am just trusting and open to them.
Today I am thankful for the (long awaited) warmth and sunshine. For my baby who is sleeping peacefully in his crib. For my husband who works so hard and loves his family more than anything. For Emily who is a great all around kid. For both sets of our parents, who are still married and who offer us constant support and love. For my business mentor. For my spiritual mentor. For all our friends and family. For my doggies. For this home. For our family business. And, for all the people that came before us.
Thank you God for the opportunity to even be here at all...walking this Earth, making these connections. I will continue to keep my eyes on you.
Matthew 7:24-26 "Therefore whoever hears these sayings of mine, and does them, I will liken him to a wise man, which built his house on a rock: And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat on that house; and it fell not: for it was founded on a rock. And every one that hears these sayings of mine, and does them not, shall be likened to a foolish man, which built his house on the sand."
Monday, February 25, 2013
7 Months!
Honestly, the only things I miss about "Life Before Eli," are more writing time and reading before bed. It's challenging to carve out time to write and I have a giant goal that I am working on right now. Something I am so excited about. Something I feel called to do, but creating space to make this happen has been tricky to say the least. You see it's winter and Rob is working so much (snow plowing, snow removal in the middle of the night, ice ponds...). So, life for me is hanging with my baby (which I of course love) and working. When he does nap, it's time to "get er done" - hurry and clean bathrooms, transfer and fold laundry, wash bottles! And, reading at night? Those days are long gone! I am SO tired at night. I can rockstar it all day long...but, at night I am an old, old woman who is dead tired by 8PM.
The good news is that Eli has been officially kicked out of our bedroom. It only took me 7 months to become comfortable with this idea. My cousin Sara has two children. Two girls. One 7, one 2. She told me that with Emily (age 7) she never did any sleep training and Emily continues to wake in the night and has trouble falling back to sleep on her own (needs water, etc.). So, when Shelby came along she knew she had to do something different. So, she did the Ferber (known as, "cry it out") Method. If you've never actually read the method, it sounds mean. But, basically it's this...you put your baby where you want baby to sleep BEFORE baby is sleeping. That way baby doesn't wake up and wonder where the heck he is! Let baby cry for a designated amount of minutes (the amount of minutes changes each day). If baby cries past designated number of minutes then you go in, and make your presence known. You're not allowed to pick the baby up or "help" baby go back to sleep. You can only stay one minute. Long story short...THIS METHOD WORKS! First night, Eli cried for 20 straight minutes. Rob and I were watching the new James Bond Movie, Skyfall, and had it turned up loud (hey, we had to do what we had to do!). He woke up once in the night and cried for less minutes than the designated check in time, so we didn't have to go in. That's not to say I wasn't waking up throughout the night and peeking in on him (this was a big step for me to move him in his own room). Fast forward a week later and he is sleeping through the night...ten hours straight?! What?! How could this be?! I'm still on the tired side because our day starts quite early (5 to 5:30a.m). Some nights he does wake and cries, but is able to put himself back to sleep without us coming to the rescue! His crying doesn't bother me because in my heart I know that this is good for him. Crying all by himself in his own room? Yes, people...YES. I do still check on him, mainly because I am so used to waking up several times in the night. But, I know that will become fewer and farther between. It's a new day in our household.
Eli is sitting up, rolling all over the place, and can plank (hold the whole weight of his body). When he planks, he is starting to put one knee down...he's getting in position for crawling - he just doesn't know it yet. This age is fantastic! He says da da da (not associating this with his actual Dad, it's just what he can say - and I love reminding Rob of that, ha!). He's eating solids, likes all the vegetables (his favorite is squash). So far he likes mangos, applesauce and pears. I can't get him to like peaches and bananas, but I will try again...because he didn't like peas right away and now he tears them up! So, it's true that you need to introduce a food multiple times. I continue to love how expressive Eli is. He smiles so much and laughs. His dog, Molly (a 2yr old Rott), and his Daddy make him laugh the most. He just starts laughing when he sees either one of them. I wonder what he's thinking. He's a good baby and I know that the Lord has blessed us greatly with this particular baby. He is pure joy. He is all things good. I will never forget my journey to becoming a Mother. I will thank my Great Big God, daily.
The good news is that Eli has been officially kicked out of our bedroom. It only took me 7 months to become comfortable with this idea. My cousin Sara has two children. Two girls. One 7, one 2. She told me that with Emily (age 7) she never did any sleep training and Emily continues to wake in the night and has trouble falling back to sleep on her own (needs water, etc.). So, when Shelby came along she knew she had to do something different. So, she did the Ferber (known as, "cry it out") Method. If you've never actually read the method, it sounds mean. But, basically it's this...you put your baby where you want baby to sleep BEFORE baby is sleeping. That way baby doesn't wake up and wonder where the heck he is! Let baby cry for a designated amount of minutes (the amount of minutes changes each day). If baby cries past designated number of minutes then you go in, and make your presence known. You're not allowed to pick the baby up or "help" baby go back to sleep. You can only stay one minute. Long story short...THIS METHOD WORKS! First night, Eli cried for 20 straight minutes. Rob and I were watching the new James Bond Movie, Skyfall, and had it turned up loud (hey, we had to do what we had to do!). He woke up once in the night and cried for less minutes than the designated check in time, so we didn't have to go in. That's not to say I wasn't waking up throughout the night and peeking in on him (this was a big step for me to move him in his own room). Fast forward a week later and he is sleeping through the night...ten hours straight?! What?! How could this be?! I'm still on the tired side because our day starts quite early (5 to 5:30a.m). Some nights he does wake and cries, but is able to put himself back to sleep without us coming to the rescue! His crying doesn't bother me because in my heart I know that this is good for him. Crying all by himself in his own room? Yes, people...YES. I do still check on him, mainly because I am so used to waking up several times in the night. But, I know that will become fewer and farther between. It's a new day in our household.
Eli is sitting up, rolling all over the place, and can plank (hold the whole weight of his body). When he planks, he is starting to put one knee down...he's getting in position for crawling - he just doesn't know it yet. This age is fantastic! He says da da da (not associating this with his actual Dad, it's just what he can say - and I love reminding Rob of that, ha!). He's eating solids, likes all the vegetables (his favorite is squash). So far he likes mangos, applesauce and pears. I can't get him to like peaches and bananas, but I will try again...because he didn't like peas right away and now he tears them up! So, it's true that you need to introduce a food multiple times. I continue to love how expressive Eli is. He smiles so much and laughs. His dog, Molly (a 2yr old Rott), and his Daddy make him laugh the most. He just starts laughing when he sees either one of them. I wonder what he's thinking. He's a good baby and I know that the Lord has blessed us greatly with this particular baby. He is pure joy. He is all things good. I will never forget my journey to becoming a Mother. I will thank my Great Big God, daily.
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